Jade and I went up the mountain one night, for no reason at all, except to see what we could see. I had my camera along, because I always have my camera along, but we also packed a pair of puppies with us, some wool gear for when the air turned cold during the nightrise, and the good and comfortable company of each other.
I love Jade. She’s one of my best friends and to make matters even more excellent, she and her husband (a smokejumper, also, and a true surrogate brother to Robert and I) bought the house exactly next door to ours here in Pocatello. We call it the compound and it has been one of the most special experiences of my adult life to have good friends so near every moment of the day. Most mornings, Jade and I have coffee together. One of us brews a french press and strolls around, through two gates, through the raspberry patch, past the grapevines and into the companionship of the other. We pour our cups of coffee, add our milk and when the weather was warmer, we would sit on porch steps in the sun and simply talk for a couple of hours. It is such a glorious way to wake up to the day in the loving company of a best friend. She is a painter and leatherworker, among other things, and shares my studio space with me. We share dinners, watch movies, give each other seeds we have harvested from our gardens and lend or borrow a lawnmower back and forth. There is an understanding between us that stems from being girls, creatives and fire wives. Jade’s little family is an extension of our little family and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
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I was having some body work done by my massage therapist a couple of months ago and she asked me what my life mantra was. The actual word “mantra” isn’t part of my daily lexicon so I was stumped for a moment and then I told her I didn’t think I had a mantra. So she rephrased the question so I could better understand and find a true answer. She asked me if there’s a phrase I live by on a daily basis. Here’s what I said:
“Yes!”
That was my answer to her as well as the phrase I have been living by for the past year or so. When I get asked to do something, to be involved in something, to go somewhere, to spend my time a certain way and if the situation will involve our friends or family or a really unique life opportunity, I try not to think too hard about it. I let myself respond as reflexively as possible. I simply say, “Yes.” Then I do my best to make the commitment work.
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I realized something a few years ago after nearly working myself to death (which is relatively normal, small business takes your EVERYTHING — so does full time creative work) building The Noisy Plume: life is short. It becomes more and more apparent to me as I watch my grandparents in the twilight of their wonderful lives, as I watch my parents age, as I see our siblings and friends having babies and growing the next generation, as I see the lines of a life well lived begin to pepper my face. I’m not going to live forever. Neither are you. I am concerned that when I lay in the quiet of a failing heartbeat on my deathbed that I will regret how much time I spent worrying, how much time I spent on my computer hitting a “like” button, how many days I sacrificed making memories with the people I love on the land I adore for a small job I didn’t pour my heart and soul into. When I realized all of this, I decided to say yes as often as possible to the people closest to me, even if there were 100 unanswered and festering emails in my inbox, even if I was straddling a deadline in the studio, even if I was running late on photo submissions for freelance work — I started setting those things aside and doing a better job of living for love, living for the love of life, living for the love of experiences.
More often than not, this makes me a terrible business woman, an incompetent emailer, and let’s face it, the volume of work coming out of my metal studio has slowed to a dribble — part of that has to do with an energy shift in my work. I’m doing more freelancing than metalsmithing at the moment so the decrease in productivity in the studio makes perfect sense. But I digress. Let me tell you something, I have had such a wonderful year here. I have traveled extensively. I have explored and adventured. I have spent time with my best friends, I have made new friends, I have learned so much about them, about myself, about the world, about nature. More often than not, I have allowed myself to catapult in any direction on any given day and the freedom has changed who I am, taught me who I want to be, and fortified some of my relationships in wonderful ways. This has been a year of living for me! It has been grand. I want to serve my friends and family as energetically and commitedly as I have served my small business over the years. I want to pour myself into them and make memories so that when I walk towards the light at the end of the tunnel someday, I’ll walk in a soft cloak of assuredness that I lived this life well and served my people with a whole heart and my full attention.
My sister Caroline, on Robbie’s side of the family, pointed out the flip side of all this “yessing” I’ve been doing while we were with our family clan at Thanksgiving in San Diego last week. She pointed out that no matter what, saying yes to something means saying no to something else, even if you don’t say the word. And she’s right about that — no is a byproduct of yes; we had best make the word and the commitment count.
Make it worth it every time you say “Yes.” I think it’s the best way to live without regret.
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When Jade and I went up the mountain that night, we went up the mountain for no reason at all (which is sometimes the best reason of all) except to be in the company of each other, to ride in a delightful 1966 Dodge Powerwagon, to laugh at the puppies with us and pet their soft ears, to talk, to enjoy the silence when we didn’t talk, to watch the sun set and the moon rise. We went out of love for each other, love for life and love for the word “Yes.”
Thank you for sharing your thoughts…living a life without regrets is the only way, really, even if that involves hitting Likes (that I dislike so much, and yet I do). The puppy holding the paw looking out the truck window slays me. So lovely to have Jade…Happy December 3rd to you and Jade xo
I think it’s maybe not 100% possible. There will be something niggling at us when we get to heaven and it will be up to God to tell us it’s ok!!! 🙂
I know. Those puppies. You couldn’t possibly imagine how puppy rich this fall was. So much FUN!
The word “yes” is such a wonderful word. I so enjoyed this post and the puppies and Jade. You are living this life well, dear Plume…every single moment of it!!
Sometimes I stand in an empty room and say it at varying degrees of loudness and quietness — in a whisper and in a shout. It’s a kind of thrill.
I love this post! By the end, my heart broke wide open and I felt YES fill my every being. I have a dear sister friend like this too……but she is in Alaska, and I New Mexico. We talk on the phone weekly and dream of the day we will get to be neighbors and share our lives like this! Thank you for the hope and living the physical version of our dreams…so we can more concretely say YES to manifesting it in our own lives! Much love. Meekah
Good!
And AK to NM is way too far. Someone needs to relocate…or maybe you should meet in the middle?
X
This made me cry xo
You dear woman.
XX
Such a great post-both words and photos. Thank you.
Thanks for being here Tracey.
X
*LIKE*
xx
GUFFAW!!!!
🙂
Oh, the irony.
XX
Oh yes, just yes, I needed to read about your year of yes today. Fabulous stuff woman!
Thanks, babe. X
Amen to every single word! The biggest gift I’ve received/given myself as I add another number to my age is this~recognizing the power of words, especially the ones I say only to myself, inside my head. Often the “yes” is scary and unknown, but more often it blooms into opportunity to see, and be, and try, and do something different…I’m OWNING my YES like never before, it’s a beautiful thing! Aloha~
YESSSS!!! Everything about this. I have been saying this for years (of course, with a few minor hiccups). Ever since I saw “Yes Man”…maybe that’s not the right title of the movie. It was good though. <3 <3 <3
Or what about Walter Mitty!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!???
He just DID stuff…and then he did more stuff…and then he saw the snow leopard…
I can’t believe you referenced Walter Mitty! I have that movie on all the time, sometimes I watch it twice in a day. I had a physical reaction to reading your post (the hair on my arms stood up and I cried), I think it was just what I needed to read at this point in my life.
Never underestimate your wisdom in learning this life lesson in your 20’s and 30’s instead of your 50’s and 60’s! Smart Woman. Beautiful Soul. Yes.
I’m always thankful for the big life lessons of 20 and 30. Trust me. But there’s always so much more to learn…I might finally be a good person right when I take my last breath. HA! Love having you here. X
You are so inspiring, dear Plume. Your photos, your words, your craft, your fabulous style- They all point to one thing: life. You are so vibrant with life. Thank you for sharing, and for inspiring us all to live more fully. xo
Megan.
Thank you.
Keep on trucking, baby.
X
Yes!
Kisskiss. X
this post just opened my eyes, widened my heart, bolstered my spirit.
yes.
bless you, dearest friend.
xx
Good!
XXX
You are so lucky to have your best friend right next to you. I love your life, your words, your work, it’s so inspiring.
I would like to have ALL of them in the neighborhood but I know I am lucky to have one right next door. x
yes, we only live once….and our family, our friends, our closest people and their lives our life are the biggest tresure, relationships, experiences, time together…it passes, it flies away…
Catch it up and enjoy every single moment of this life.
xo
True true! X
I was born with a “yes gene.” My grandmother, my mother– we all say yes, all of the time. There’s a fine balance of yessing and taking some no-time to reflect and simply be alone. I’m still finding the balance. Thank you for sharing!
What you say is true. Is balance really possible? I’m starting to think that all the teeter tottering is just the way life is.
Thanks for being here.
I think it’s important to acknowledge where we are in our lives as well, and our good fortune, part of it hard work and hard choices, part of it glorious luck, that we are able to choose “yes.” We are able to choose because we don’t worry where our next meal is coming from, how to make rent, ensure our safety. “Yes!” is a lot easier and romantic when we have the freedom to do so.
May it be so for all.
I always appreciate you taking the time to share your opinions, Brandi. Naturally, I must apologize for being too romantic for your tastes!
Two things:
1. I don’t assume that everyone reading this blog is wealthy and carefree.
2. I do not believe money = “yes”.
PbbbbbPbt…I wouldn’t call that anything to apologize for! No, I don’t believe that money equals “yes,” either. Wealth is not only held in material goods, not nearly. We are wealthy in love, in friendships, in our experiences and our joys where ever we find them. I think what I’m trying to say, though I’m having a hard time articulating it, is that while not all are capable (physically, monetarily, time-wise) to say “yes” to some of those large things, we can still have gratitude for our ability to say “yes” to what we’re capable of in the constraints of our own time and lives, chosen consciously or not.
*I still don’t think I said it quite right…
And being financially comfortable sure as heck helps…
Copy that. I agree.
Yes. Such a profound little word. Guides you down a path, and in your case the path is filled with adventure and life. What a great way to lead one’s life. Just wanted to stop by and say hi to my favorite Idaho Ambassador.
And going up the mountain for no reason at all is all the more reason to go. 😉
Idaho ambassador!!! Ooh. I like THAT.
X
Love the pups, your friend and that awesome truck. Who paid a million bucks to get it restored, are you allowed to get it dirty in the bush? Looks like a garage queen!
Oh. It’s a real pavement princess.
Some fella in Boise refurbished it. It’s actually a registered Idaho classic truck and is only supposed to be driven in parades!!! That said, we didn’t whomp it too hard, though it certainly could have taken any beating put to it. It’s such a great rig. They don’t make them like that anymore.
I had the wonderful joy of living as apartment-mates with my best friend for three years before she married (and moved with her new hubby to the apt. downstairs for 6 months as a break-in to leaving me, LOL!). During those 3 years, we laughed, cried over men, vacationed, wondered if we would EVER find the right guy, if we would have kids, etc… We often had our big talks or cry-fests sitting on her bed. I remember often saying that as much as we yearned for our lives to progress, we should try our hardest to dig deep and enjoy every second of our time together as singles, because one day, we hoped, we would look back on those years and perhaps yearn for the freedom and ease just a bit.
Fast forward 8 years, and my two children now share her old room. Often, as I sit on their beds at night, and listen to their stories and pray with them, I am completely and totally OVERTAKEN with joy and gratitude. For those years, and for these years. For the free and wonderful time of living with her, and for the manifested prayers sleeping beside me and in the room next to me. Oh! God is good!
My point to this long ramble is: embrace this time with your friend, fully. It is a precious gift. I know you know this.
xx
Ah…then you have an idea of what I speak of! I do cherish this time. So does Robert. We have a move in the works here and I fear we’ll never have best friends this close ever again.
Those velvety puppy ears make me sigh, with a smile. (You and your friend look pretty good too :o) – here in the city, watching a young dog (or any cousin of Penelope) trotting up the sidewalk is one of my greatest pleasures along with watching the sky (and trees). I am truly glad you live so close by such good friends (what a great story !)
This is so right : life is short and what I am saying “yes” to is increasingly in direct relation to love. With the awareness that it means saying “no” to other things ;o)
Dogs make the world a better place:) I actually really like to watch dogs in the city too. They are so different than the dogs we live around here. I cannot actually remember the last time I had one of our pups on a leash…
Oh those photographs!!!!! the 2 (very very) pretty girls that you are, the doggies, you being her neighbor and vice verca, the real friendship, nature, traveling, sharing your (wonderful) life, your jewelery,I could go on and on….and yes, life is short and should be lived intensively or “fully” as much as we can, I agree.
I am a “yes” girl myself, letting the doors open to whatever…you are not a bad business woman, you are an artist who also has to recharge her batteries from time to time.
Gorgeous post and photographs!!!! big hello to both of you!!!
Hi Nathalie!!!
Missed you!
And I agree, it’s a beautiful life.
X
So where DID the puppies come from? Are they your’s Jillian? Or are they Jade’s? Or borrowed? Puppies are IMPORTANT, we need to know! 🙂
OH! The puppies. I wish they were mine. Inga, the dalmatian, is Jade’s. Stella, the pointer, belongs to friends of ours.
Happy for your continued success. It takes a lot of work to pull together what you and your hubby have. Ahhh….choices about how we spend our time. Yes indeed! In another lifetime my husband and I were soooo busy. He was gone a lot…spending the nights in hotels on the road for the work our company did. I was home more but busy orchestrating things for him and the crews and dealing with all the craziness that comes from having a business and employees and contracts and vendors…oh my!
Life eventually led us to quite a different path. We said yes to more time spent precisely the way we wanted to spend it. We downsized our operation mucho but my happiness has never been bigger.
Cheers to the accomplishment of each of us finding the way to say YES to the life that brings us fulfillment.
I hear you on the SO busy. I actually have been in a kind of mental crisis here with regards to Robert going back to work, where I’m going to live, how spring and summer are going to look for us. Living in two states every year causes more chaos than you could imagine.
How do we do it? Anyway? People ask me that all the time. I don’t even have any good advice after 6 years of this…
“We downsized our operation mucho but my happiness has never been bigger.” I like the sounds of that. 🙂 The moment I feel like business is preventing me from living my life, I tend to step away for a big, allow myself to drop all the balls I am juggling in thin air. I’m never afraid to walk away from things…for a time…or forever.
Glad you guys got it figured out.
X
This is a beautiful post Jillian. Thank you for writing it.
Lately, on the top of my to-do lists for the day…I write, “learn to say no.” I have a generous spirit that is always saying yes to things, even when i hear my own inner voice saying “what! don’t agree to this..” But really, after reading your post, I realized what I am doing by learning to say “no” is actually learning to say “yes” to my inner voice and my own spirit. It’s the opposite side of the same coin! What I truly need to be doing with this one short, precious life, is to say yes to my own fulfillment and needs at the soul level. Thanks for reminding me, it is all a matter of perspective. xo
I hear you.
I know it’s just perspective…just like glass half full or glass half empty. But I like to recognize all that is being said YES to instead of clinging to everything that is being said NO to — something about yes really buoys me up.
I like what you wrote here.
The gift of “being ” is never over rated. I am very concerned about the present generation that is stuck to devices, head bowed over a phone , never seeing the beautiful sunset or distant vista. You have quite the wisdom for such a wee girl, aye?
If only I had your skill with words to express how gorgeous this piece of writing is, how much it means to me on this sunny-rainy afternoon, in the wake of my grandmother’s passing a few weeks ago, after just getting off the phone with a former neighbor and dear friend — making plans for our own compound that we have spoken of building together so often. These words ring so true; they and the photographs joining them so beautifully composed. Yet again, this blog is magic. Thank you for sharing these thoughts and your mantra.
We create beautiful things with our hands and yet an animal is a most gorgeous “accessory”. Just looking at their reflecting, liquid/solid eyes — what miraculous apparatus — and their whole beings, tails and all, lean into ours…
And to be able to reside and communicate with another human in silence, together yet separate, in the same peaceful way, is a rare friendship gift.
Hello Jillian,
I am reading this post again and it really deserved a second read, you sort of describe yourself like some “butterfly” but in fact you just evolve, you, your work, your works and of course your jewelery making gets thinner but you do so much more “work”.
It is pure evolution….very nice post about a different side of yourself and/or your life. We read and we get to know you better and better, and yes, you do reply to your mails it doesn’t have to be right away…by doing this it is more like a real letter.
And having an effect of a real letter but by email, is (for me) quite a great job!
…..And your work gets better and better….your photographs too.
This is a great site/blog/website/always getting better and better always!!!! Fabulous.
Yes, yes, yes so many yeses! Love this so.
I know you have said before but I can not remember. What camera do use use? Your pictures are just magical.