Howdy guys,

Just a quick note to let you know I wiped Instagram off my phone last Friday. I need a break. I’ll be away from that app for the duration of June and I’ll see how I feel about it in July. I’ve grown tired of seeing how people treat each other in that space, I’ve grown tired of people constantly policing other people, I’ve grown tired of being told what I should say, how I should act, what I should eat, how I should live, I’m tired of all the virtue signaling. But most of all, I’m tired of feeling defensive and nervous each time I post an image and share thoughts in that space. Each day I spend hours of my life moderating and monitoring comments in fear, wondering who is going to send me a hateful message, wondering which post-feminist is going to tell me my words aren’t feminist enough or that my thoughts are without value because I’m white, thin and blond…wondering which activist vegan is going to publicly elaborate on my immorality. I’ve started to expect the worst of people which is very unlike me. I need a break. I think we ALL need a break. Instagram is a great app but I need to recalibrate my relationship with it, I need to get my joy back. I can’t serve you the way I want to when my joy is broken.

My break from Instagram comes at a tremendously chaotic time here in the USA and I want to tell you that I’m taking this time to shut the hell up and listen and learn from black people. Black lives are important and I stand with peaceful protesters across this country. I also stand with all the wonderful police officers out there who signed up to serve and protect and make a difference in our world and do exactly that on a daily basis.

A culture changes not when enough laws are in place to control people, but when the hearts of the people shift, change, and grow. We are called higher. We are called deeper. Let’s go.

Lastly, in the month of June, I will continue to share and write in this blogging space about whatever I feel like sharing. I will continue to talk with my friends and family about what is currently going on in the USA (and everywhere), about what I’m learning about racism, and if I feel like sharing some of what I am learning in this space, I will. If I feel like sharing about my farm or my studio work, I will. I’ll share what I want, when I want to. Summer is reaching for the solstice now, the growing season is full throttle here and I’m just keeping my head above water. I have been starting many of my mornings feeling strangled by time, choked by the noise of the world, frustrated by my limitations, and I find these words return my courage to me, make me slow to speak, and settle my heart into a place of simplicity and outwardness:

ALL THOUGHTS, WORDS, AND ACTIONS ARE AN OFFERING TO GOD.

And so I go. Take care of yourselves and be good to one another.

Love,

Jillian